This work was inspired by the photographer Claude Cahun and finds its origin in the in queer scene. However this project is pushed from the performance border to transgender. Like work done by photographer Del Lagrace, the concept comes from a feeling of being out cast. Personage on the picture merges two personalities. A white face sad clown portrays one of the characters in this dedoublement of personality; the other actor is the part of my life as a transgender. By mixing those two personages this self portrait try to pass a feeling of loneliness in difference. The reference to the white clown come from the heavy ‘make up’ use during performance and similarity use when I cross dress as a drag king. But moreover this constant smile or emotion painted on their face that I associate to personal feeling in an everyday performance.